In the words of Joey Joseph Lawrence, “woah!”
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| halfway through the storm? |
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| I cautiously took a little walk… |
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| asked mr. blue jay what he thought of this mess! He screeched in reply, but I don’t speak blue jay. |
Today we got deluged in snow. I could barely open the front door, cars were completely covered in snow by dusk, and all around the neighborhood people were trying to cope… skiing, digging…
What a mess! Of course I start to think about tomorrow, when I’m supposed to make a trip up north for a family gathering. I sure hope this is a bit cleared up by morning!
Which brings me to today’s topic- navigating holidays with a significant other.
Of course, there are many variations to this: a boyfriend/girlfriend of 6 months would be a different situation than a married couple with a child, of course. Living in the same city makes things fairly simple I have observed, while others struggle with splitting time between two different coasts, or even countries. So what’s a gal to do?
I have to admit, it is a big obvious sign to me that I’ve got myself a keeper in man-go-round when I am willing to split a holiday to be with him. I’m pretty close to my family, and I wouldn’t sacrifice time with them for any old guy (granted, his family is awesome, so that helps TREMENDOUSLY). It took me a few years to get to a place where I was willing to split Christmas between our houses (in the same state). I like to spend a lot of time at my parents’ house, especially during holidays. I do a major part of the cooking with my mama, and being the youngest I sort of like to pretend I’m still a kid for the weekend. However, at a certain point we must grow up, and start to think of our S.O.s and their families as our family too. I’m very new to this still, and only have one holiday so far under my belt where this was successfully done. So I’m offering up some common tactics I’ve seen used for splitting this time, and REQUESTING ANY ADVICE that anyone might have on the subject! Here goes:
1. Splitting major holidays on an every-other-year plan. This way you sacrifice time with your own family, but don’t have to worry about travel anxiety, rushing around, etc.
2. Splitting the actual holiday. As stated above, here you might feel a bit more crunched for time with each family, but get to see everybody. This obviously works only if the two families are within a reasonable distance of each other.
3. Combining both families for a holiday (we’ve actually done this pretty successfully with a birthday, a mothers’ day, and some other occasions in my family. It might be overwhelming on Christmas, I suppose, but it would have been nice this Thanksgiving when we had tons of food for a teeny tiny group!)
4. Celebrating early/ late- One of my sisters has early Christmas each year, making their own new tradition. I know a family that celebrates “Christmas in July” for their east coast family, combining with a summer trip.
5. Doing your own thing (i.e. not visiting either family). Hey, it’s an option. ( but don’t worry Mom, I’m pretty sure I could never miss any part of Christmas with you unless it was with my other “family.”)
What do y’all do to keep your sanity and keep feelings intact? Especially those of you with larger families, when things are a bit trickier? And what happens when you add extended relatives, step-families, and others into the mix?
I bid you adieu from this winter wonderland * * *
Meri
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